The easter holidays are in full swing, bringing the usual raft of challenges for co-parents which are further exacerbated by forecasts of travel chaos by land, air, road and sea.
As always, putting children’s best interests and happiness first should always be the top priority – as difficult as this may be when external elements threaten to disrupt the best laid plans.
Kate Banerjee, Head of Jones Myers Children’s Department, shares some practical tips for co-parents to ensure their children return to school bursting with upbeat stories to tell their friends about the great times they enjoyed with both their parents.
Have A Back Up Plan And Be Flexible - If the predicted travel chaos curtails your combined plans for dividing the holiday period with your children, adapt your arrangements to prevent undue stress – both on yourselves and on them.
It has been proven time and again that children are particularly susceptible to tensions which, in some cases, can impact on their emotional and behavioural development in later life.
Having a back-up plan for any ‘ What If’ scenarios - which can include one of you falling ill or a family crisis - will serve you both well. This can apply to easter outings with one parent being rescheduled until after the official bank holiday – most children don’t return to school until April 20.
Co-operate And Communicate - Be mindful of your children’s welfare and happiness at all times – it is not a competition over who can spend the most time with them
In scenarios where things go awry such as being late for picks up or drop offs, avoid manifesting your frustration and being irritated with each other. Above all, in the presence of your children and the absence of the other parent, avoid criticising each other.
Be Respectful And Realistic -Accept and respect that you cannot influence the decisions and choices of your former spouse. Be mindful and tolerant of each other’s cultures, routines and family routines which may include a co-parent wanting to involve their children in extended family birthdays or religious festivals.
Build Up A Support Network - Juggling many balls is no mean feat for any parent, particularly for separated parents who are single handedly trying to manage school schedules, along with work and household demands.
Your network can include close friends and relatives you can rely on and trust - and who won’t let you down if plans start to unravel. Seek out local community groups where you can meet and relate with like-minded parents.
At Jones Myers, our holistic approach sees us act as a signpost for councillors and relevant channels of support that co-parents can benefit from – you do not have to undertake this journey alone.
This spirit of goodwill through considerate co-parenting can positively impact on your children’s happiness and wellbeing in the short, medium and long term.
Jones Myers Harrogate office is located at 5 Victoria Avenue, HG1 1EQ. For queries on all aspects of divorce and family law, call 01423 276104. Visit www.jonesmyers.co.uk, email info@jonesmyers.co.uk or tweet @helpwithdivorce
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